Thulani Lorch

Left Forward - Bidco United
1 Oct 2029
Monday
Process

Marked for Thulani Lorch

163 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

10 Sep 2029
From our football correspondent Upbeat

Market

Eliud Lokuwam puts it in writing

“This is not anger. I have thought about it for months, and nothing that has happened lately changed my mind.” The request is on a desk at Bidco United, and it is not being withdrawn.

Player ratings

What a way to start for Jayden Nunes-Wickham — 7.29

0 on the scoresheet on his first appearance and a mark of 7.29 beside it. Most debuts are got through; this one was enjoyed, by him and by everybody watching it.

The dugout

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Player ratings

Nobody could get near Simon Munala

Successful dribbles: 22. Every time he got the ball somebody had to make a decision, and every time the decision was wrong.

Squad

A row about effort at Bidco United

Somebody said out loud what several people thought about how hard another man trains, and Simon Munala was in the middle of it. The one dressing-room argument that is genuinely about football.

The terraces

Bidco United supporters have found a favourite in Jayden Nunes-Wickham

There is a particular warmth a ground reserves for a 20-year-old it feels ownership of. Jayden Nunes-Wickham has it now, and everything he does for the rest of his time here will be measured against the goodwill he was handed for free.

Match

Christopher Raila sends Bidco United past Sofapaka

It finished 1‑0, and it was Christopher Raila’s afternoon: on the scoresheet when it mattered, and the reason the points belong to Bidco United.

Transfer targets

Ibrahim Wanzala stays at Kakamega Homeboyz as time runs out

A deal that was a phone call from completion at lunchtime was dead by midnight. Bidco United will try again when the window opens; Kakamega Homeboyz may not be selling by then.

Player ratings

A masterclass from Christopher Raila

Marked 8.10 — the sort of number a correspondent writes down twice to be sure. Everything he tried came off, and what he did not try was not worth trying.

In brief

Back issues
162 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

3 Sep 2029
From our football correspondent Steady

Market

Thulani Lorch says no to Ulinzi Stars

“I listened, I thought about it, and I am staying. That is the whole story.” The clubs had agreed a fee. Thulani Lorch had not agreed to go, which turned out to be the part that mattered.

Player ratings

Thulani Lorch, 19, steals the show — 7.66

Marked 7.66 at 19, in a side that makes no allowances for age. He did not need any, and he looked the least nervous man on the pitch.

Market

Felix Mulyungi puts it in writing

“This is not anger. I have thought about it for months, and nothing that has happened lately changed my mind.” The request is on a desk at Bidco United, and it is not being withdrawn.

Boardroom

Deadline passes with 8 signed and 9 gone

That is the business done at Bidco United until the window opens again. Whether it was enough will be answered on Saturdays rather than in a column, and the first Saturday is close.

Transfer targets

Elly Saenyi will not be coming to Bidco United

Terms were offered and declined. Whether it was the wages, the role or the town, nobody at Muranga Seal is saying, and nobody at Bidco United is enjoying the guessing.

The dugout

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Squad

Words exchanged at Bidco United

Eliud Lokuwam and a teammate said things this week that will take longer than a week to unsay. It was not about football, and both of them play on Saturday.

Squad

A row about effort at Bidco United

Somebody said out loud what several people thought about how hard another man trains, and Simon Munala was in the middle of it. The one dressing-room argument that is genuinely about football.

The terraces

One of their own: Thulani Lorch

He is 19 and the ground already sings his name, which is a thing that happens to local boys and almost never to signings. Everything from here is measured against an affection he did nothing to earn except be from here.

In brief

161 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

27 Aug 2029
From our football correspondent Crisis

Market

Bidco United turn down Posta Rangers for Eliud Lokuwam

The offer was not close and it was refused without much discussion. Whether the second one is refused as quickly is another matter.

Player ratings

Ovella Ochieng runs at them all day

Successful dribbles: 27. There is a particular sort of despair on a full-back's face by the seventieth minute, and it was on display.

Transfer targets

Bidco United agree $12.0K for Stephen Otieno

The clubs have shaken hands with Posta Rangers; the player has not yet. Personal terms are next, and personal terms are where more deals die than anybody prints.

Market

Denis Owino puts it in writing

“This is not anger. I have thought about it for months, and nothing that has happened lately changed my mind.” The request is on a desk at Bidco United, and it is not being withdrawn.

The dugout

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Transfer targets

Ibrahim Wanzala’s move to Bidco United collapses on the table

Fee agreed, terms agreed, and a scan that said otherwise. He goes back to Kakamega Homeboyz; Bidco United go back to the market; and both will insist there is no story here.

Transfer targets

An offer of $170.0K for Elly Saenyi

Bidco United have gone to Muranga Seal with a bid, and the supporters have gone to the internet with an opinion about it. Whether either changes anything is up to the selling club.

Squad

A falling-out at Bidco United

Eliud Lokuwam and a teammate went at it, and not about football. Training grounds are small places and a long season makes them smaller.

Market

Thulani Lorch attracts admirers

The name of Thulani Lorch has come up in conversations Bidco United were not part of. Nothing formal, nothing signed — but nothing about it accidental either.

In brief

159 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

13 Aug 2029
From our football correspondent Uneasy

Market

Eliud Lokuwam puts it in writing

“This is not anger. I have thought about it for months, and nothing that has happened lately changed my mind.” The request is on a desk at Bidco United, and it is not being withdrawn.

Player ratings

No sign of nerves from Thulani Lorch at 19 — 7.90

The hardest thing about being 19 in a senior side is that nobody makes allowances. Thulani Lorch did not need any: 7.90, and he looked the most comfortable man on the pitch.

Transfer targets

John Otieno’s move to Bidco United collapses on the table

Fee agreed, terms agreed, and a scan that said otherwise. He goes back to AFC Leopards; Bidco United go back to the market; and both will insist there is no story here.

Squad

Tempers go at Bidco United

Eliud Lokuwam was at the centre of it, and by the time it was pulled apart there were three or four others involved. Training grounds are small places and long seasons make them smaller.

Squad

Simon Munala falls out with a teammate over standards

The oldest argument in any dressing room and the only one that is genuinely about football: one man thinks another is not putting enough in. It is also the row a manager privately does not mind having happened.

The dugout

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Match

Two points walk out of the ground

Level with 94 minutes on the clock, after an afternoon Bidco United had all but put away. AFC Leopards will call it a point earned; the home dressing room will call it two given away, and both of them are right.

The dugout

The team sheet said everything about Eliud Lokuwam

Warm-up bib, ninety minutes of watching, and a handshake at the end that fooled nobody. Big matches tell you who a manager trusts; this one told Eliud Lokuwam.

Squad

Kennedy Ochieng stays put

“The easiest signature of my career.” Kennedy Ochieng and Bidco United agree another 2 years, and the manager can plan around him rather than about him.

In brief

158 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

6 Aug 2029
From our football correspondent Uneasy

Player ratings

Ovella Ochieng was unplayable

Successful dribbles: 39. He went past people as if he had been told there was a prize for it, and by the end the full-back had stopped pretending to try.

Market

Pheko Phago asks to leave Bidco United

“I have given everything here and I need a new challenge.” The request is formal, and the relationship will never be quite the same again.

Match

Christopher Raila breaks Tusker hearts

Some goals win a match and some take one off somebody else. Christopher Raila scored in the 87th minute, Tusker had already begun thinking about the journey home, and Bidco United took the lot.

The dugout

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Squad

Thomas Wainaina signs on for more

“Some decisions take a long time. This one took ten minutes, and most of that was finding a pen.” Thomas Wainaina and Bidco United agree another 2 years.

Squad

Words exchanged at Bidco United

Eliud Lokuwam and a teammate said things this week that will take longer than a week to unsay. It was not about football, and both of them play on Saturday.

Match

Bidco United end the wait against Tusker

It had gone 6 games. The players did not celebrate like men who had won a match; they celebrated like men who had been let out of something.

Transfer targets

Kakamega Homeboyz tell Bidco United: Ibrahim Wanzala is not for sale

The approach was made and the answer came back in a sentence. There is no number on the table because there was no number that would have been enough.

The terraces

The crowd has taken to Thulani Lorch

At 19 he is being sung about by people twice his age, which is an affection a signing has to earn over years and a local kid gets for turning up. It is also the hardest thing in football to live up to.

In brief

157 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

30 Jul 2029
From our football correspondent Uneasy

Squad

A knee injury of the worst kind for Steve Hoffman

16 days on the estimate, and a long, private, unglamorous year of a rehabilitation nobody watches. Bidco United lose a footballer; he loses considerably more than a season.

The dugout

John Kelwishi keeps the receipts

“I remember the meeting. I remember exactly what was promised in it.” Bidco United may remember it differently, which is precisely the problem.

Market

Not going: Thulani Lorch stays at Bidco United

“I know what people will say. I know what I want, and it is here.” Muranga Seal had the fee agreed and the shirt ready; they did not have the player, and now they will not.

Match

6 matches without a win for Bidco United

The run now stands at 6, and the questions being asked around Bidco United are no longer polite ones.

Transfer targets

Bidco United agree $330.0K for Elly Saenyi

The clubs have shaken hands with Muranga Seal; the player has not yet. Personal terms are next, and personal terms are where more deals die than anybody prints.

Player ratings

Ovella Ochieng was unplayable

Successful dribbles: 26. He went past people as if he had been told there was a prize for it, and by the end the full-back had stopped pretending to try.

Market

Denis Owino hands in a written request

“I have nothing bad to say about this place. I just need to be somewhere else.” It is in writing now, which changes what Bidco United can pretend not to have heard.

The dugout

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Squad

A falling-out at Bidco United

Eliud Lokuwam and a teammate went at it, and not about football. Training grounds are small places and a long season makes them smaller.

In brief

154 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

9 Jul 2029
From our football correspondent Steady

Squad

A knee injury of the worst kind for Steve Hoffman

37 days on the estimate, and a long, private, unglamorous year of a rehabilitation nobody watches. Bidco United lose a footballer; he loses considerably more than a season.

Market

Pheko Phago asks to leave Bidco United

“I have given everything here and I need a new challenge.” The request is formal, and the relationship will never be quite the same again.

Player ratings

Thulani Lorch, 19, steals the show — 7.95

Marked 7.95 at 19, in a side that makes no allowances for age. He did not need any, and he looked the least nervous man on the pitch.

The dugout

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Squad

Steve Hoffman stays put

“The easiest signature of my career.” Steve Hoffman and Bidco United agree another 2 years, and the manager can plan around him rather than about him.

Squad

Words exchanged at Bidco United

Eliud Lokuwam and a teammate said things this week that will take longer than a week to unsay. It was not about football, and both of them play on Saturday.

Squad

Words at Bidco United training over how hard people work

Somebody said out loud what several people had been thinking. Simon Munala is at the centre of it, and the squad will now find out whether the standard rises or the pair of them simply stop speaking.

Player ratings

One of those days for Christopher Raila

There is a version of this player everybody suspected was in there, and on this evidence it is. 8.00, and no argument anywhere in the ground.

The dugout

A promise honoured at Bidco United

Something was said to Daniel Kakai and then it happened. In this industry that passes for remarkable, and the dressing room noticed faster than any supporter could.

In brief

152 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

25 Jun 2029
From our football correspondent Upbeat

Squad

A knee injury of the worst kind for Steve Hoffman

51 days on the estimate, and a long, private, unglamorous year of a rehabilitation nobody watches. Bidco United lose a footballer; he loses considerably more than a season.

Transfer targets

Bidco United agree $9.0K for Arnold Matumele

The clubs have shaken hands with KCB; the player has not yet. Personal terms are next, and personal terms are where more deals die than anybody prints.

Market

Bernard Ongoma puts it in writing

“This is not anger. I have thought about it for months, and nothing that has happened lately changed my mind.” The request is on a desk at Bidco United, and it is not being withdrawn.

The dugout

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Squad

Eliud Lokuwam in a row with a teammate

It was not about football and everybody who saw it knows that. Two men who have to play together on Saturday said things at Bidco United this week that will take longer than a week to unsay.

Transfer targets

Shabana tell Bidco United: Nyamawi Beja is not for sale

The approach was made and the answer came back in a sentence. There is no number on the table because there was no number that would have been enough.

The terraces

One of their own: Thulani Lorch

He is 19 and the ground already sings his name, which is a thing that happens to local boys and almost never to signings. Everything from here is measured against an affection he did nothing to earn except be from here.

Player ratings

Shafic Ssebyala runs at them all day

Successful dribbles: 19. There is a particular sort of despair on a full-back's face by the seventieth minute, and it was on display.

Match

Eliud Lokuwam the difference as Bidco United beat Mara Sugar

Ask anyone on the way out what separated the sides and you will get one name: Eliud Lokuwam. 1‑0 against Mara Sugar, and the applause at the whistle was mostly his.

In brief

150 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

11 Jun 2029
From our football correspondent Steady

Squad

A knee injury of the worst kind for Steve Hoffman

65 days on the estimate, and a long, private, unglamorous year of a rehabilitation nobody watches. Bidco United lose a footballer; he loses considerably more than a season.

Market

Pheko Phago hands in a written request

“I have nothing bad to say about this place. I just need to be somewhere else.” It is in writing now, which changes what Bidco United can pretend not to have heard.

Market

Not going: Thulani Lorch stays at Bidco United

“I know what people will say. I know what I want, and it is here.” Muranga Seal had the fee agreed and the shirt ready; they did not have the player, and now they will not.

Transfer targets

Fee done, terms next for Nyamawi Beja

Bidco United and Shabana have settled on $300.0K. The rest belongs to the player and his agent, and a supporter who has watched one of these before knows not to buy the shirt yet.

Transfer targets

Arnold Matumele is a medical away from Bidco United

The deal with KCB is done in every sense but the one that puts him on the pitch. Nothing goes wrong at this stage, except on the occasions when it does.

The dugout

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Squad

Words exchanged at Bidco United

Eliud Lokuwam and a teammate said things this week that will take longer than a week to unsay. It was not about football, and both of them play on Saturday.

Match

Bidco United come up short against Shabana

Shabana left with the points after a 1‑3 defeat that will take some explaining on the terraces.

Squad

A row about effort at Bidco United

Somebody said out loud what several people thought about how hard another man trains, and Simon Munala was in the middle of it. The one dressing-room argument that is genuinely about football.

In brief

149 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

4 Jun 2029
From our football correspondent Upbeat

Squad

A knee injury of the worst kind for Steve Hoffman

72 days on the estimate, and a long, private, unglamorous year of a rehabilitation nobody watches. Bidco United lose a footballer; he loses considerably more than a season.

Market

Eliud Lokuwam puts it in writing

“This is not anger. I have thought about it for months, and nothing that has happened lately changed my mind.” The request is on a desk at Bidco United, and it is not being withdrawn.

The dugout

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Market

Muranga Seal join the queue for Thulani Lorch

Add another name to the list: Muranga Seal have asked the question everybody in the game has been asking about Thulani Lorch. The answer from Bidco United has not changed — yet.

Squad

Words at Bidco United training over how hard people work

Somebody said out loud what several people had been thinking. Simon Munala is at the centre of it, and the squad will now find out whether the standard rises or the pair of them simply stop speaking.

Squad

A falling-out at Bidco United

John Kelwishi and a teammate went at it, and not about football. Training grounds are small places and a long season makes them smaller.

Match

Gor Mahia take the points off Bidco United

Beaten 0‑1, and beaten fairly. The manager kept his words short afterwards, which was probably wise.

The dugout

Ibrahim Omurwa faces the questions

“We were not good enough today and I am not going to dress it up.” Ibrahim Omurwa after 0‑1, in the tone of a man who knows the next question and does not intend to answer it.

Squad

A place in the month's best eleven for Ovella Ochieng

Four or five weekends of consistency, judged against everybody in the division doing his job. Ovella Ochieng has come out of that comparison in the side, and Bidco United have had the benefit of every one of those afternoons.

In brief

148 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

28 May 2029
From our football correspondent Upbeat

Squad

The knee: Steve Hoffman out for 79 days

79 days on the announcement, and a year of quiet, unwatched rehabilitation behind it. Bidco United lose a player for a season; he loses something harder to name.

Player ratings

Thulani Lorch, 19, plays like he has been here for years — 8.27

A mark of 8.27 means one thing beside a twenty-nine-year-old's name and something else entirely beside a 19-year-old's. Nobody at the ground needed telling which this was.

Player ratings

Nobody could get near Ovella Ochieng

Successful dribbles: 27. Every time he got the ball somebody had to make a decision, and every time the decision was wrong.

The dugout

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Squad

Tempers go at Bidco United

Eliud Lokuwam was at the centre of it, and by the time it was pulled apart there were three or four others involved. Training grounds are small places and long seasons make them smaller.

Match

Thulani Lorch the difference as Bidco United beat Bandari

Ask anyone on the way out what separated the sides and you will get one name: Thulani Lorch. 2‑1 against Bandari, and the applause at the whistle was mostly his.

The terraces

Bidco United supporters have found a favourite in Thulani Lorch

There is a particular warmth a ground reserves for a 19-year-old it feels ownership of. Thulani Lorch has it now, and everything he does for the rest of his time here will be measured against the goodwill he was handed for free.

Match

Bidco United are at home on the road

3 straight away victories. Sides that win away are usually sides that can defend and can counter, and the table has begun to reflect what those journeys have earned.

Squad

A row about effort at Bidco United

Somebody said out loud what several people thought about how hard another man trains, and Christopher Raila was in the middle of it. The one dressing-room argument that is genuinely about football.

In brief

143 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

23 Apr 2029
From our football correspondent Uneasy

Squad

The knee: Steve Hoffman out for 114 days

114 days on the announcement, and a year of quiet, unwatched rehabilitation behind it. Bidco United lose a player for a season; he loses something harder to name.

Player ratings

Thulani Lorch, 19, steals the show — 7.72

Marked 7.72 at 19, in a side that makes no allowances for age. He did not need any, and he looked the least nervous man on the pitch.

Market

Felix Mulyungi asks to leave Bidco United

“I have given everything here and I need a new challenge.” The request is formal, and the relationship will never be quite the same again.

Match

4 matches without a win for Bidco United

The run now stands at 4, and the questions being asked around Bidco United are no longer polite ones.

Squad

Eliud Lokuwam in a row with a teammate

It was not about football and everybody who saw it knows that. Two men who have to play together on Saturday said things at Bidco United this week that will take longer than a week to unsay.

Squad

Words at Bidco United training over how hard people work

Somebody said out loud what several people had been thinking. Daniel Kakai is at the centre of it, and the squad will now find out whether the standard rises or the pair of them simply stop speaking.

The dugout

No hiding place for Eliud Lokuwam

“I pick players who do the work. All of it.” No name was spoken; every camera still turned to Eliud Lokuwam, and the manager let it.

Player ratings

A masterclass from Shafic Ssebyala

Marked 8.12 — the sort of number a correspondent writes down twice to be sure. Everything he tried came off, and what he did not try was not worth trying.

Player ratings

Ovella Ochieng beats them one at a time

Successful dribbles: 17. There was always a defender in front of him and there was never a defender in front of him for long.

In brief

141 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

9 Apr 2029
From our football correspondent Crisis

Squad

Steve Hoffman damages knee ligaments — 128 days out

The words a physio says slowly. 128 days is what the club will announce and everybody who has heard this diagnosis before knows the number is the least of it: the knee comes back before the player does.

Player ratings

Ovella Ochieng was unplayable

Successful dribbles: 39. He went past people as if he had been told there was a prize for it, and by the end the full-back had stopped pretending to try.

Market

Pheko Phago hands in a written request

“I have nothing bad to say about this place. I just need to be somewhere else.” It is in writing now, which changes what Bidco United can pretend not to have heard.

The dugout

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Squad

Words exchanged at Bidco United

Eliud Lokuwam and a teammate said things this week that will take longer than a week to unsay. It was not about football, and both of them play on Saturday.

Squad

Words at Bidco United training over how hard people work

Somebody said out loud what several people had been thinking. Daniel Kakai is at the centre of it, and the squad will now find out whether the standard rises or the pair of them simply stop speaking.

Match

A bad afternoon for Bidco United against Tusker

0‑1 to Tusker, and no complaints worth printing. The performance asked for nothing more than it got.

The dugout

The view from the dugout

“We will look at it, we will learn from it, and we go again.” The three sentences every manager keeps for a 0‑1 defeat, delivered by Ibrahim Omurwa to a room that had heard them before.

Market

No place for Thabang Letsoalo in the plan

“The manager did not use many words, and he did not need to.” Thabang Letsoalo has his answer from Bidco United; what he does with it is the next window’s story.

In brief

140 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

2 Apr 2029
From our football correspondent Steady

Squad

Steve Hoffman damages knee ligaments — 135 days out

The words a physio says slowly. 135 days is what the club will announce and everybody who has heard this diagnosis before knows the number is the least of it: the knee comes back before the player does.

Player ratings

Thulani Lorch, 19, plays like he has been here for years — 7.99

A mark of 7.99 means one thing beside a twenty-nine-year-old's name and something else entirely beside a 19-year-old's. Nobody at the ground needed telling which this was.

The dugout

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Squad

Tempers go at Bidco United

Eliud Lokuwam was at the centre of it, and by the time it was pulled apart there were three or four others involved. Training grounds are small places and long seasons make them smaller.

Squad

A row about effort at Bidco United

Somebody said out loud what several people thought about how hard another man trains, and Daniel Kakai was in the middle of it. The one dressing-room argument that is genuinely about football.

Market

No place for Levian Ochieng in the plan

“The manager did not use many words, and he did not need to.” Levian Ochieng has his answer from Bidco United; what he does with it is the next window’s story.

Match

Honours even between Bidco United and Ulinzi Stars

1‑1, and both dressing rooms will call it two points lost. A draw that asked plenty of questions and answered none of them.

The dugout

No hiding place for Thabang Letsoalo

“I pick players who do the work. All of it.” No name was spoken; every camera still turned to Thabang Letsoalo, and the manager let it.

The dugout

Ibrahim Omurwa: “We have to be better”

“It is not the end of the world and it is not good enough. Both of those are true.” The manager, after a 1‑1 draw, said the honest thing and then went to say it again inside.

In brief

137 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

12 Mar 2029
From our football correspondent Crisis

Squad

The knee: Steve Hoffman out for 156 days

156 days on the announcement, and a year of quiet, unwatched rehabilitation behind it. Bidco United lose a player for a season; he loses something harder to name.

Player ratings

Ovella Ochieng runs at them all day

Successful dribbles: 26. There is a particular sort of despair on a full-back's face by the seventieth minute, and it was on display.

The dugout

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Squad

Words exchanged at Bidco United

Daniel Kakai and a teammate said things this week that will take longer than a week to unsay. It was not about football, and both of them play on Saturday.

Match

Bidco United come up short against Mathare United

Mathare United left with the points after a 0‑1 defeat that will take some explaining on the terraces.

Player ratings

Both jobs done by Thulani Lorch — 6.81

A midfielder is measured on whether the team functions when he is on the pitch, which is nearly impossible to see and completely obvious in retrospect. 10 actions, 6.81, and a manager who will not be substituting him again in a hurry.

Squad

Words at Bidco United training over how hard people work

Somebody said out loud what several people had been thinking. Christopher Raila is at the centre of it, and the squad will now find out whether the standard rises or the pair of them simply stop speaking.

Squad

Bernard Ongoma signs a new deal

“I never wanted to be anywhere else. There is unfinished business here.” Bernard Ongoma commits to Bidco United for another 1 years.

The dugout

Ibrahim Omurwa answers for it

“The supporters are entitled to be angry. So am I. We will put it right.” 0‑1, a manager saying the necessary things, and a dressing room that heard a different version of them.

In brief

133 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

12 Feb 2029
From our football correspondent Upbeat

Match

Nobody wins at Bidco United

17 home matches unbeaten. Visiting sides arrive already talking about the atmosphere, which is usually the sign that they have half-lost before kickoff.

Player ratings

No sign of nerves from Thulani Lorch at 18 — 8.01

The hardest thing about being 18 in a senior side is that nobody makes allowances. Thulani Lorch did not need any: 8.01, and he looked the most comfortable man on the pitch.

The dugout

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The dugout

Denis Owino keeps the receipts

“I remember the meeting. I remember exactly what was promised in it.” Bidco United may remember it differently, which is precisely the problem.

Squad

Words exchanged at Bidco United

Eliud Lokuwam and a teammate said things this week that will take longer than a week to unsay. It was not about football, and both of them play on Saturday.

Squad

Simon Munala falls out with a teammate over standards

The oldest argument in any dressing room and the only one that is genuinely about football: one man thinks another is not putting enough in. It is also the row a manager privately does not mind having happened.

The terraces

One of their own: Thulani Lorch

He is 18 and the ground already sings his name, which is a thing that happens to local boys and almost never to signings. Everything from here is measured against an affection he did nothing to earn except be from here.

Match

Thulani Lorch the difference as Bidco United beat Shabana

Ask anyone on the way out what separated the sides and you will get one name: Thulani Lorch. 2‑0 against Shabana, and the applause at the whistle was mostly his.

Transfer targets

Deadline beats Bidco United to Jonas Mailula

The clock did what Muranga Seal would not, and ended it. Supporters who watched the countdown will spend the next window doing it again.

In brief

131 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

29 Jan 2029
From our football correspondent Upbeat

Transfer targets

Bidco United make their move for Delton Oyo

$43.0K on the table at APS Bomet. The manager wanted him, the board agreed a number, and the only voices still to be heard are the ones at the other club.

Squad

Eliud Lokuwam in a row with a teammate

It was not about football and everybody who saw it knows that. Two men who have to play together on Saturday said things at Bidco United this week that will take longer than a week to unsay.

Squad

Christopher Raila falls out with a teammate over standards

The oldest argument in any dressing room and the only one that is genuinely about football: one man thinks another is not putting enough in. It is also the row a manager privately does not mind having happened.

The dugout

No hiding place for Thulani Lorch

“I pick players who do the work. All of it.” No name was spoken; every camera still turned to Thulani Lorch, and the manager let it.

Match

Bidco United in the hunt for Europe

Position 5, 57 points, and a run-in that decides whether next season has Thursday nights in it. Nobody is calling it a race yet, which is what people say during one.

Market

Shafic Ssebyala linked with a move away

The name of Shafic Ssebyala keeps appearing in other people's back pages. Bidco United say nothing, which says plenty.

In brief

122 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

27 Nov 2028
From our football correspondent Upbeat

Squad

Ochieng Masika breaks a bone — 44 days out

Brutal, unambiguous and, for all the horror of the moment, usually less career-shaped than the ligament everybody fears more. 44 days, a clean timeline, and a return date somebody can actually plan around.

The dugout

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Squad

A falling-out at Bidco United

Daniel Kakai and a teammate went at it, and not about football. Training grounds are small places and a long season makes them smaller.

Squad

Christopher Raila falls out with a teammate over standards

The oldest argument in any dressing room and the only one that is genuinely about football: one man thinks another is not putting enough in. It is also the row a manager privately does not mind having happened.

Squad

Bidco United lose Paul Mhlanga

30 days, the medical staff say, and medical staff are optimists by profession. The team sheet will look wrong without him.

Market

The Eliud Lokuwam story refuses to die

It has been denied twice and printed three times, which is the usual arithmetic. Until Eliud Lokuwam signs something — a contract at Bidco United or anywhere else — this column belongs to him.

In brief

90 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

17 Apr 2028
From our football correspondent Steady

Squad

The knee: Michael Bodo out for 21 days

21 days on the announcement, and a year of quiet, unwatched rehabilitation behind it. Bidco United lose a player for a season; he loses something harder to name.

Squad

A fracture rules Denis Owino out for 44 days

Bones knit. That is the one merciful thing about this injury and the reason Bidco United will talk about it more openly than they would about a knee. He will be back, and roughly when they say.

Player ratings

Ovella Ochieng runs at them all day

Successful dribbles: 26. There is a particular sort of despair on a full-back's face by the seventieth minute, and it was on display.

Match

9 unbeaten for Bidco United

Hard to beat is not the same as winning, but 9 matches without defeat is a foundation Bidco United did not have in the autumn.

Squad

Eliud Lokuwam in a row with a teammate

It was not about football and everybody who saw it knows that. Two men who have to play together on Saturday said things at Bidco United this week that will take longer than a week to unsay.

Squad

Simon Munala falls out with a teammate over standards

The oldest argument in any dressing room and the only one that is genuinely about football: one man thinks another is not putting enough in. It is also the row a manager privately does not mind having happened.

Match

John Kelwishi rescues a point for Bidco United

It needed John Kelwishi to find the net to bring anything home at all: 1‑1 against AFC Leopards, and half the dressing room will call it a point won.

The dugout

Ibrahim Omurwa: “We have to be better”

“It is not the end of the world and it is not good enough. Both of those are true.” The manager, after a 1‑1 draw, said the honest thing and then went to say it again inside.

The dugout

No hiding place for Thulani Lorch

“I pick players who do the work. All of it.” No name was spoken; every camera still turned to Thulani Lorch, and the manager let it.

In brief

79 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

31 Jan 2028
From our football correspondent Upbeat

Squad

Michael Bodo damages knee ligaments — 98 days out

The words a physio says slowly. 98 days is what the club will announce and everybody who has heard this diagnosis before knows the number is the least of it: the knee comes back before the player does.

The dugout

Felix Mulyungi keeps the receipts

“I remember the meeting. I remember exactly what was promised in it.” Bidco United may remember it differently, which is precisely the problem.

Market

John Otieno hands in a written request

“I have nothing bad to say about this place. I just need to be somewhere else.” It is in writing now, which changes what Bidco United can pretend not to have heard.

Squad

A row about effort at Bidco United

Somebody said out loud what several people thought about how hard another man trains, and Daniel Kakai was in the middle of it. The one dressing-room argument that is genuinely about football.

Squad

A falling-out at Bidco United

John Kelwishi and a teammate went at it, and not about football. Training grounds are small places and a long season makes them smaller.

The dugout

No hiding place for Denis Owino

“I pick players who do the work. All of it.” No name was spoken; every camera still turned to Denis Owino, and the manager let it.

In brief

73 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

20 Dec 2027
From our football correspondent Upbeat

The dugout

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Squad

Words at Bidco United training over how hard people work

Somebody said out loud what several people had been thinking. Daniel Kakai is at the centre of it, and the squad will now find out whether the standard rises or the pair of them simply stop speaking.

Squad

Words exchanged at Bidco United

Lungelo Kunene and a teammate said things this week that will take longer than a week to unsay. It was not about football, and both of them play on Saturday.

In brief

72 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

13 Dec 2027
From our football correspondent Upbeat

Match

Bidco United refuse to drop out of the race

Position 2, 63 points, and the result everyone checks first is now theirs. The word is still not being said around the ground, which is how you know everyone is thinking it.

Squad

Bidco United count the cost of losing Felix Mulyungi

17 days, the scan says, and scans are kinder than reality. The fixtures in that window have just become somebody else’s job.

Squad

Daniel Kakai falls out with a teammate over standards

The oldest argument in any dressing room and the only one that is genuinely about football: one man thinks another is not putting enough in. It is also the row a manager privately does not mind having happened.

Squad

A falling-out at Bidco United

John Kelwishi and a teammate went at it, and not about football. Training grounds are small places and a long season makes them smaller.

The dugout

The manager makes Wasi Ngala a promise

Nothing in writing and nothing in public: a word about playing time, given face to face at Bidco United. The team sheets over the next month will show whether it was worth having.

Market

The Shafic Ssebyala story refuses to die

It has been denied twice and printed three times, which is the usual arithmetic. Until Shafic Ssebyala signs something — a contract at Bidco United or anywhere else — this column belongs to him.

In brief

71 Edition

The Bidco United Herald

6 Dec 2027
From our football correspondent Upbeat

Squad

Words exchanged at Bidco United

Eliud Lokuwam and a teammate said things this week that will take longer than a week to unsay. It was not about football, and both of them play on Saturday.

Squad

Simon Munala falls out with a teammate over standards

The oldest argument in any dressing room and the only one that is genuinely about football: one man thinks another is not putting enough in. It is also the row a manager privately does not mind having happened.

The dugout

The manager makes an example of Felix Mulyungi

“If you cannot run for the shirt, somebody else will wear it.” No name was used and none was needed; every player in that room knew who it was for.

Squad

Simon Munala slips down the pecking order

The demotion a club never announces and a dressing room always notices. Simon Munala is further from the side than he was, and the reason will not be given until he asks.

Market

A long bet from Bidco United on Thulani Lorch

He is 17, and nobody at Bidco United signed him for this season. Deals like this are judged in four years, by people who may not still be in the building.

Market

The Ovella Ochieng talk will not go away

Another week, another link, another denial nobody quite believes. Bidco United know the market decides these things, not the back pages — but the back pages are louder.

In brief