Patrick Ryerson

Goalkeeper - Mjondalen
19 Sep 2038
Sunday
Process

Marked for Patrick Ryerson

617 Edition

The Mjondalen Chronicle

24 May 2038
From our football correspondent Crisis

Squad

Nickolay Årsbog breaks a bone — 31 days out

Brutal, unambiguous and, for all the horror of the moment, usually less career-shaped than the ligament everybody fears more. 31 days, a clean timeline, and a return date somebody can actually plan around.

Match

4 matches without a win for Mjondalen

The run now stands at 4, and the questions being asked around Mjondalen are no longer polite ones.

Squad

Andreas Nygård in a row with a teammate

It was not about football and everybody who saw it knows that. Two men who have to play together on Saturday said things at Mjondalen this week that will take longer than a week to unsay.

Match

Kristian Birkelund’s goal not enough for Mjondalen

Kristian Birkelund scored, and precious little else went right: 1‑2 to Valerenga, and a quiet walk to the dressing room.

Player ratings

A masterclass from Kristian Birkelund

Marked 8.91 — the sort of number a correspondent writes down twice to be sure. Everything he tried came off, and what he did not try was not worth trying.

Squad

Donat Mehmeti gets it from the manager

“Nobody here is above being told.” It was not said with a name attached, but the dressing room can count, and so can everybody who was listening.

In brief

Back issues
582 Edition

The Mjondalen Chronicle

21 Sep 2037
From our football correspondent Crisis

The terraces

The mood at Mjondalen has turned into something else

Supporters who sing when it goes badly are supporters. Supporters who gather afterwards are a problem, and everybody inside the building knows which of the two this now is.

Player ratings

Donat Mehmeti scores twice — 9.03

Two goals and a mark of 9.03 to go with them. Strikers are judged on afternoons like this one and remembered for far fewer of them than people imagine.

Player ratings

Age has not caught Nickolay Årsbog yet — 8.50

At 33 he is supposed to be managing his minutes. Instead he was marked 8.50 and looked, for ninety minutes, exactly like the player everybody remembers.

Squad

Andreas Nygård in a row with a teammate

It was not about football and everybody who saw it knows that. Two men who have to play together on Saturday said things at Mjondalen this week that will take longer than a week to unsay.

Squad

Lars Markmanrud falls out with a teammate over standards

The oldest argument in any dressing room and the only one that is genuinely about football: one man thinks another is not putting enough in. It is also the row a manager privately does not mind having happened.

Match

Mjondalen find a way past IK Start

IK Start made Mjondalen work for it, but the scoreboard read 2‑0 at the end and the table does not ask how.

Squad

Defences have started doubling up on Lima

6 goals and a season average of 7.45 will do that. The space he used to find has gone; he keeps scoring anyway, which is the mark of the real thing.

Player ratings

A defender's afternoon for Lars Markmanrud

Defensive actions: 19. He was first to everything and second to nothing, and the goalkeeper had an easy day because of it.

Squad

Keerat Singh Mann left out for the big one

A player who expected to start watched it instead. The manager will call it a decision for the team; Keerat Singh Mann will call it something else in private.

In brief

565 Edition

The Mjondalen Chronicle

25 May 2037
From our football correspondent Uneasy

Squad

A fracture rules Stian Ryerson out for 28 days

Bones knit. That is the one merciful thing about this injury and the reason Mjondalen will talk about it more openly than they would about a knee. He will be back, and roughly when they say.

Squad

A one-man rearguard from Andreas Nygård

There were 6 saves in it, and at least three that had no business being saves at all. The ten outfield players owe him a drink and they know it.

Player ratings

Nickolay Årsbog, 33, rolls back the years — 8.18

There is an age at which every good afternoon gets described as a throwback, which is unfair and also accurate. 8.18 at 33, and nobody on the pitch was better.

Squad

Christian Mork Breivik in a row with a teammate

It was not about football and everybody who saw it knows that. Two men who have to play together on Saturday said things at Mjondalen this week that will take longer than a week to unsay.

Squad

Words at Mjondalen training over how hard people work

Somebody said out loud what several people had been thinking. Lars Markmanrud is at the centre of it, and the squad will now find out whether the standard rises or the pair of them simply stop speaking.

Player ratings

Ninety minutes of Lima at his very best

Marked 8.71. Players have careers without a single afternoon like this in them, and he has just had one in front of everybody at Mjondalen.

Match

No time for Valerenga to settle

The goal that put Valerenga ahead was still being replayed on the concourse when Mjondalen equalised, 3 minutes later. Leads are only worth what you do with them.

Match

Mjondalen and Valerenga take a point apiece

It finished 2‑2, and it somehow always looked like it would. One of those afternoons where the table moves less than the tempers.

Player ratings

Nobody could get near Kristian Birkelund

Successful dribbles: 15. Every time he got the ball somebody had to make a decision, and every time the decision was wrong.

In brief

545 Edition

The Mjondalen Chronicle

5 Jan 2037
From our football correspondent Crisis

Squad

A knee injury of the worst kind for Keerat Singh Mann

85 days on the estimate, and a long, private, unglamorous year of a rehabilitation nobody watches. Mjondalen lose a footballer; he loses considerably more than a season.

Boardroom

Mjondalen put Interim Coach on notice

The board have said in public what they had been saying in private. Results between now and the next meeting decide it, and everybody in the building knows the arithmetic.

Boardroom

Crisis meeting at Mjondalen

The official line will be that it was routine. It was not routine, the timing says so, and every person in that room knows what the next bad result costs.

Squad

Andreas Nygård in a row with a teammate

It was not about football and everybody who saw it knows that. Two men who have to play together on Saturday said things at Mjondalen this week that will take longer than a week to unsay.

Squad

When it matters, Kristian Birkelund plays

It is never announced and it is entirely visible: the biggest afternoons of the season keep containing him. A press box works this out long before anybody at the club confirms a word of it.

Squad

The manager's exit leaves Donat Mehmeti exposed

Every squad has men who were signed by a particular manager and men who were merely inherited. Donat Mehmeti is in the first group, and the man who wanted him here is no longer in the building.

In brief